So hey,

How is everyone?.. This weekend was kind-of funky. We had our first bible study meeting.. I kind of opened up a lot, only because my brother did too. I ended up telling everyone how I hate the way things are in 2|42.. or at least.. certain parts that I do not like. It was good.. the bible study in all.. was good. Hopefully it will continue on a route that is positive and encouraging. On Saturday I went to 2|42.. with my brother and everything. It was good…. again it felt like they were going over very basic stuff that everyone and their mom would know… but I suppose reviews are good.

The message in church was about the Fear of Failure. It was good in some parts, just over the fact that I want to dedicate my life to Christ, and right now I’m not worrying so much about school, but more over the direction that he is pointing me in, and me trying to figure that out.. because I can be a failure in the worlds eyes, as long as I do what God has me to do.. thats all that matters to me.. thats all that has mattered to me *if you have read anything that I’ve posted in almost the last year .. you’d know that* Sometimes I tell people that I am enrolled in MCC, which technically I am.. I’ve only taken a few classes.. but I am out of class right now until probably August of next year so I can get myself out of debt, in the surplus.. you know.. afford school? hah yeah.. talk to some friends..my Pastor… family.. and pray… and really see where I am headed in this life of mine. I’m living for God.. not me… I just want to understand more… of where I am headed… and everything entailed with that. Its a big thing.. and not everyone will do it.. or agree with it. Thats not my problem.. I know for a fact that some people think that I am wasting away my life right now by not being in school.. but … I .. don’t believe so. I’m 20 years old.. soon to be 21. So I figure going to school with a little college… at the age of 21 isnt so bad, and I will have a better understanding of what I’ll be doing.. If I go back to MCC, or maybe if I pray about it enough I’ll find that I am .. or am not supposed to be their.. or somewhere else. Time will tell thats all I can say. I will trust in God.

On Saturday night I got a call from Becky.. from the person that I already decided I wasn’t really going to speak with anymore.. and she told me.. that she saw me today in church but didn’t say hi to me because she didn’t feel like telling me everything that has went on. So that she might not say anything much to me because she doesn’t want to say too much.. it threw me off with my equealibrium. I was actually kinda sad??? figure that one out… I suppose somewhere inside me I still like her?.. Anyway.. I got that message during church… replied.. just kinda saying that I’d just pray for her. But I think I origrinally listened to the message incorrectly.. I think… that I thought she was going through something… but blah.. guess not. Prayer cant hurt anyway… afterwards we went to Lori’s (from 2|42) and watched Kill Bill (stupid movie) and The Big Bounce (eh.. it was so so). Then we went to the coffee house.. had a nice dicussion about a few different things that have been bothering him.. and then went home.

So yeah… thats my case right now… and speaking of that we went to the case for the creator… and let me openly give it two thumbs down. It wasn’t good.. I was extreemly bored during it.. sure it had maybe one or two interesting facts.. but not anything i’d remember today. Infact.. I’m glad Hanna couldn’t make it, because I don’t feel it was anything she was looking for. She is looking for cold hard facts about the faith.. about why she should believe.. all this other stuff.. and she has done her research on why she doesn’t believe.. and if I wasn’t so strong in my faith.. it might had shaken me a little. I really had hoped this would be good.. but it wasn’t really of facts.. it was more of scientistis opinions of what they think. No real facts about anything.. cept that they really just think the uniververse is too complex to be a accident or chance. Oh big deal.. I coulda told you that much.

Work? well it turns out they are going to be doing a schedule rebid.. which means.. based on stack ranking from the past 3 months.. we will have like 60 different schedules to choose from (say 10 are from 9am – 6pm) and the first 10 on stack pick that shift.. then the remaining people have to pick from the rest… cept we fill out this sheet and put like 20 different results.. because we don’t know what we get until we get it. Its all fun and games… but I do want to push my hours up to 40 now that I have the chance. Other than that.. its been alright. Jason isn’t going to be my manager.. for the time being.. because he is switching to mornings.. and Skip (my old manager) is going to become my manager again. So its all gravy…

Random fact… Many times.. I find myself talking to people.. but not looking to give any information about myself.. but rather .. have them tell me about their life. I don’t know why.. I think it is easier that way… not always the best way tho…

I dont think I have anything else… cept tonight on the way home.. Becky called me because I pulled up to her car without looking in her direction or anything. So she talked to me for a few minutes… it was… unexpected to have her call me.

Either way…….Listen to this song…. its a good one. I’m gunna jet… I need to… shower… and then head to do prayers.. hopefully read.. and then sleep!

God Bless, take care

Pray Hard.

Ciao