Hey

A friend let me read this and wants some feedback.. so leave your comments of what you think :

Sitting at the edge the rock she looks out to the sun as it is setting behind the deep green forest walls. Enjoying the last rays of the sun shine through the leaves of the trees onto her tan skin she stretches her arms in the air and rolling her neck in a circle as though she has just awoken from a deep sleep, water was soon splashed into her face and a familiar soothing voice spoke to her, “Lothian!” Shocked and startled she looks around and sees Naferia waiting in the water for her below. Her long black hair floated around her and she looked up at Lothian with her cerulean blue eyes. “Have you been up here all afternoon?” She said as she jumped onto the rock next to her. All of a sudden Naferia’s face went into shock, “Look at your tail!” She bent down and lifted Lothian’s scaled sea green fish tail onto her lap. “Look how dry your scales are! You can’t keep doing this, laying out in the sun all day is not good for your scales. You know you are not supposed to be out of the water any longer than a couple of hours at a time!” She ran her webbed hands gracefully up and down Lothian’s tail gently and gracefully examining every inch. “Hmmm, the rib and the fin part of your tail aren’t too bad but the rest of it is very dry and flaky. Luckily I have some fish oil, but we will put that on tomorrow morning after you scales have had time to recover from today’s sun rays. Come on.”

So what do you think?