Hey

So I think I have this thing of typing about my weekend after its pretty much over.

Its been interesting.. thats for sure.

On friday.. I … uhm. got a haircut.. and it looks horrible. I don’t like it at all hah, so after work.. I switched out my phone case at the sprint store after some rep named Jason gave me a hard time about it. Until he opened up the new case.. and saw first hand what was wrong with the old one. It was good, I was like.. “yeah thats what I’m talking about.” Friday night went to Mimi’s Cafe w/my parents, came home.. and we decided against a movie, but instead to go on Saturday when its cheaper instead of paying almost 9bucks a person. Later that night.. (9:30pm) I fell asleep for like 2 or 3 hours. I was dead tired (because the night before I had talked to Tara until.. maybe 4 or 5am I think.. If that is incorrect she will tell me and i’ll remove this part. hah! So I woke up at 12:30 and was all hot.. because I fell asleep on my bed in my coveres fully dressed. Rah. So I took a shower.. went to bed and saw tara called. I called her. On the 2nd attempt she answered, and we talked for a litte bit. At like 1am she came over my house.. haha.. so I went outside and we talked until maybe 5:30?? it was nice.. it really is nice.

So the next day we saw I, Robot. It was okay.. again I mean.. it wasn’t what I was expecting.. I thought it would have been better but alas it wasn’t. Not disappointing, but not expected. I also got a chance to pick up another book from John Eldredge. this one is “wild at heart : discovering the secret of a man’s soul” I can’t wait to read it, I really like his style of writing.

Saturday afternoon.. went to church, for the second week Sally (someone from church) attempted to have a conversation with me, for some reason.. I *shrugs* can’t find anything to talk about? I dunno.. but she hasn’t given up yet. hahaa.. keyword : yet.

Then I went to 2|42, it was alright. I think the next few weeks will be a good review of things. Now I come to a problem.. I overall am not a really ‘shy’ person.. if I know you. Put me in a room where everyone knows of me… not really knowing me..but people who’ve seen my face- but nobody has really ever has the interest to talk to me, I guess. I try small talk.. but its like there is a wall that I continue to try and break down.. you know? create an invisible wall around them to me. I am seen as a quiet person in the group and just because of that nobody will come create convo with me? I can litertally sit by myself practically the whole time and unless somebody feels bad for me.. it stays that way. If I stand in a group where everyone knows everyone.. and i’m the odd man out.. it makes me feel stupid.. they’ll talk and I won’t know what the heck they are saying.. or I just try to get into the convo but they look at you like “what are you doing?” Thats kinda what it feels like. its very odd.. I’m friendly and all.. I don’t know.. it almost feels like I am a different person. I clam up. I hate it. Imagine a person inside me screaming “No! Don’t believe the outer me.. i’m not like this!! I swear!! just give me a chance!! I just need a chance to prove you wrong” as everyone casts their eyes and then shifts to someone as everyone sits in groups. Its a sad thing, because i hate being that quiet person I turn into.. but… its hard. It really is.. I don’t know what my problem is.. and I’m going to pray about it. I’ve been going for many months and very often people that I know will come up to me and re-introduce themselves. It will come in time? This is something I will learn from? I’m not sure.. I’m hopin.. Its not only me.

They had a concert afterwards.. I had a conversation with some new people actually. It was great.. nobody that will be back next week *living in LA* but at the concert I saw people my age sitting by themselves, getting up and leaving. When I have the chance.. I talk to those people. Because I want to, not because I feel bad for them, but because I know and I can relate to them, and hey.. its nice picking up new friends, at least thats how I see it.

So, at the concert I met.. K….. ka.. oh shoot. Whats her name…… katie.. no, kaysie.. no hahaha, Kristen.. got it got it.. hahahaha.. I’m so good. Anyway.. I met her because Tara volunteered to greet people, and this girl came for the concert and was alone. So we talked to her. It was good. Invited her to go to the Xtreme bean afterwards with us, and she took us up on the offer. I went to pick up JJ, because he wanted to hang out (because we hadn’t in months). So I’m at his place.. made the haul all the way over.. and he pops out of his car. Thats good news.. he has a car. Its not bad.. I’m happy for him. So then he followed me in his car to the coffee house. We sat and talked with everyone until maybe 1:30am. Then as everyone left, me and JJ decided to stay and just chat, kind-of catch up. It was good.. as I said we hadn’t hung out for months.. little loan talked. So we sat in our cars.. parked side by side.. talking until maybe 3ish. We talked mostly about his life, but we did talk a litte about religon. It really woke me up and I felt really deep in thought. So I went in the coffee house (open 24hrs on the weekend) and drank a coffee.. Almost cried.. talking to God about everything I needed to talk to him about. It was really good for me. *sighs*

So then… I went home, and talked to Tara until 5:30? lol.. it seems to be our cutoff time. I woke up today.. (best way to start a day) at like 10 almost 11.. then we went to some market thing. It wasn’t fun.. but my mom wanted to go. After that we came home.. and here we are. I talked to Tara for a little.. (I know it seems like we talk a huge ammount, but we dont talk much during the week).

I’m kinda having a stomach ache.. butterflys in my stomach.. same thing that happens EVERY weekend or time off from work that is ending. Ah well, so next weekend I get 3 days!!! I get labor day off.. Paid!! So cool.

Anyway.. thats it for me. so .. if you ask how I’m doin…. I’ll probably say that I’m doin okay, and that is my detailed answer (see above)

Take care, Have a great Monday!!! God Bless

Pray Hard.

Ciao!