It’s been a crazy few months! So much has happened. Jays job has had crazy hours, my Grandma Gloria passed away, and just yesterday my Beloved Auntie passed away.
This post is probably going to be all over the place. I’m sad. A little heartbroken. And a piece of me longs to be in my hometown grieving with my family.
Photo I took of Auntie at Encampment
I hope you can forgive me as I grieve a little in this post. I am trying so hard to focus on all of the good memories. When she taught me how to bead, or sewed the cougar on the back of my regalia shawl, when she asked me to play my flutes in front of people (even though I was so shy and self conscious).
Auntie always had a way of making others feel special. She made everyone feel special and didn’t think twice about it. They were family and blood had nothing to do with it. Embraced with love each time they were greeted.
Years could pass and the same hug would be waiting. Auntie was a modern day super hero. She took the broken and made sure they knew they were loved. Don’t get me wrong she wasn’t just a softy. She was strong and sassy and wonderful. It’s hard saying goodbye to someone like that.
And I’m a little jealous of all the small children who were able to know her love. Because my daughter never will. I know jealousy isn’t always a good thing. But as I mourn the loss of this amazing woman who I loved so dearly, I also know that my daughter is missing out. She won’t get the opportunity to know someone so selfless and so giving. She may only hear stories. She won’t ever be blessed in the circle or listen to that contagious laugh that auntie had. I know she’s missing out.
I feel grateful that I had the chance to love and adore such a remarkable person. I hope I can somehow learn to be a little more like auntie. I hope I can pass on some of her qualities.
I love you. I will miss you. Until we meet again.
December is here!!!! Did I mention on the 27th my girl became a big 21 month old!!!???!!! Crazy how big she is!
We went and got a tree 🙂 the day after thanksgiving (and on her 21st birthday haha).
her christmas ornament
She has LOVED the lights!
We have been trying to make the holidays a little extra special for her. We plan on hunting for all kinds of decorations and lights around the city!
our little elf
And mommy is trying to do crafts with her!
So far we have made a few Christmassy items (remember these were all made with toddlers help)…
felt christmas treedecorating her treewreathe from the tree trimmingsstocking hanger Countdown to christmas rings
We’ve been trying to have fun 🙂 she even insisted on having breakfast with her bears by the tree the other day!
breakfast with bears
We went to the mall to look at their fun decorations and do some light shopping… She has a wish list on Amazon but I’m trying to do less commercial gifts and more meaningful things. Of course she is a kid and will get toys but I’d like to make her some stuff too. I just found a neat pattern for doll wipes and diapers so I’m going to attempt to sew a few things. I’m a newbie so I’m not going to expect perfection (or so I keep telling myself).
The season has only begun so who knows what is next! I’d like to create some kind of scavenger hunt for us like… A cactus decorated with lights, a unique Christmas tree, I don’t know what else but I’m going to put some thought into it! We only have a few days left 😉 I made Emy a little scarf
Ps…. I still need addresses for Christmas cards. I don’t know who has moved and who is in the same place. Please just assume that I don’t have your address because I also have a case of the mommy brain! I’ll be sending them out in waves this year because everything seems to be taking a little longer than usual to get done.
This post is probably going to be all over the place. I’m sad. A little heartbroken. And a piece of me longs to be in my hometown grieving with my family.
Auntie always had a way of making others feel special. She made everyone feel special and didn’t think twice about it. They were family and blood had nothing to do with it. Embraced with love each time they were greeted.
Years could pass and the same hug would be waiting. Auntie was a modern day super hero. She took the broken and made sure they knew they were loved. Don’t get me wrong she wasn’t just a softy. She was strong and sassy and wonderful. It’s hard saying goodbye to someone like that.
And I’m a little jealous of all the small children who were able to know her love. Because my daughter never will. I know jealousy isn’t always a good thing. But as I mourn the loss of this amazing woman who I loved so dearly, I also know that my daughter is missing out. She won’t get the opportunity to know someone so selfless and so giving. She may only hear stories. She won’t ever be blessed in the circle or listen to that contagious laugh that auntie had. I know she’s missing out.
I feel grateful that I had the chance to love and adore such a remarkable person. I hope I can somehow learn to be a little more like auntie. I hope I can pass on some of her qualities.
I love you. I will miss you. Until we meet again.
