Remember NOVEMBER?
November tiptoed in wearing a cloak of golden leaves,
And life, as always, galloped ahead like a caffeinated squirrel looking for nuts.
Daylight savings struck with its usual mischief (yuck)
Stealing sunbeams and gifting bags under my eyes.
Can we vote to banish it to the land of forgotten time?
Ezra’s eyes were checked again at OHSU (every 6 months),
And all is well in his bright little gaze…
A quiet victory tucked into the week.
The children, noble scholars of reluctance and resistance,
Trudge through their lessons like knights on muddy quests.
The grumbling and groaning with every pen stroke.
Lamenting over every lesson.
I, still attend the Women’s Bible Study,
Where my social anxiety sometimes keeps me quiet or makes me stumble over my words.
But I’ve gotten better… less babbling baboon, more brave little bird.
Plans unfurl like ribbons of chaos… birthdays, journeys, holidays
I’m exhaustedly stitching the year’s end together with threads of intention.
And oh, the clock ticks louder lately…
Ten days remain in the enchanted forest of my thirties.
I try not to stare at the path ahead too long..
Just enough to pack snacks and wear good shoes.
But Still I Ponder…
🎈 Forty 🎈
I’m standing at the edge of 40,
half-laughing, half-holding my breath.
It feels like a strange milestone…
not quite ancient, not quite young,
just… aware. The middle is here. I’m stuck in it.
Aware that time is no longer a vague concept
but a real thing with weight and wings.
There’s a whisper in the back of my mind…
a quiet voice that says,
“You’re closer to the end than the beginning.”
And I nod, because it’s true.
But I also smile,
because I’m still here.
Still waking up to the sound of my children’s feet,
still burning dinners and laughing at my own jokes,
still learning how to speak without stumbling,
still loving, still trying, still becoming, still believing.
I’ve known people who didn’t get this far.
Beautiful souls who left too soon.
So I hold this birthday with reverence,
like a candle flickering with
fragile flames that can be blown out at any time, but full of light.
I don’t know what the next decade holds.
But I know I’ll walk into it with open hands, lots of prayers,
a grateful heart, and maybe a few more laugh lines
to show I’ve lived. And you know what…
I hope I will wear them with pride.